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11:21 p.m. - 2014-02-06 That CPIP (which I am still appealing) has left me with a nasty unsettled feeling that something could go wrong at any time. A lot of the time I feel like I don't have much control over myself, my depression and my ever-encroaching darkness, so I like to think I have control of the external parts of my life. I suck at being a human being, so I like to be good at school. I NEED to be good at school. Everyone needs a little slice of sanity.
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