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8:38 a.m. - 2013-03-06
no we are not friends
I was having a perfectly good morning until Linkedin sent me another damn suggestion to connect with my lying, cheating, heartbreaking POS husband. "Do you know Matt D?" Well, I thought I did, after eight years and two kids, but I was wrong. I don't need any more reminders.

Facebook is worse, because his profile picture is MY kids. Thanks, I need that fucking reminder, Facebook. If I wanted to be Facebook friends with him I would be. I don't -- Facebook or otherwise. You'd think the Facebook elves would be able to figure out that if I share a last name and two kids with somebody else on Facebook and we're not friends, it's NOT by accident.

A. was still getting Facebook e-mails suggesting she "friend" her dead cousin a year after his death -- until she finally contact Facebook and told them he is dead.

Maybe I should contact Facebook and tell them Matt is dead.

I made a YouTube playlist of all the songs that remind me of him, and another of the six worst, so I can give exposure therapy a try. Maybe if I listen to them enough, they will stop sending me into a tailspin every time I hear them on the radio.

Right now the two worst are "Ho Hay" by the Lumineers and Pink's "Just Give Me a Reason." Those are the ones I hear the most on the radio, anyway. "Just Give Me a Reason" could be seen as optimistic (the guy says her fears are all in her head) but to me it's not because all of that was more or less what Matt said -- you're imagining things and we're fine -- and he was lying.

"Yer So Bad" -- Tom Petty -- is probably the worst. I loved that song, back when he loved me. I remember driving to West Virginia with him one weekend, just for kicks, to see Harper's Ferry, and listening to that song and that CD on the way down. My memories of that weekend are that it was perfect. His are that it was awful and I was a bitch.


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