1:16 p.m. - 2012-03-30
baconator
Friday afternoon. I finally get the damn story filed. As usual after writing on deadline, I file and come to earth realizing I didn't eat lunch, I have had to pee since 10 a.m., I am exhausted, and I smell bad. And I'm displeased with my writing. As usual. The good thing about deadlines is that when you're done, you're done; the story's gone and out of your hands, and your fate (if you are a worrier like me) is out of your hands as well. All you can do is wait for the axe to fall...
I warm up my hours-old coffee and zombie-like check youtube to see if anyone has posted any new episodes of Disappeared (I break my no-English rule for that show-- that and intervention) ... and I get slammed with an ad for the KRAFT mac-n-cheese baconator.
MAC-N-CHEESE BACONATOR? What the fuck? What the hell is a baconator? Burger? Dead animal and yellow cheese mix with elbow noodles in a box? That is gross. I don't eat burgers, I don't eat meat, and I sure as fuck wouldn't eat any kind of pasta associated with the word "baconator." So what the fuck about me signaled youtube to suggest I watch a video on the mac-n-cheese baconator? Sometimes I think these little spies in your computer are smarter than you think. Like, they know I am tired and weak right now. They know this is their chance to get me. I'm tired and weak and hungry and they show me a baconator.
Now I don't want to eat anything. Even my freaking rice chex is going to taste like Baconator. Even if I tell myself rationally there's no baconator in the rice chex, it'll still TASTE like baconator.
And I'm still hungry. F-ers.
I'm mad at myself for not doing as well on that story as I had hoped. I wasted time because I got confused over how long it was supposed to be -- I'm used to thinking in column-inches, not word count, so I wasted time writing it way too long and then whacking it that I could have used to refine it.
I'm a pretty good writer so it's still okay, but not as good as it could have been if I hadn't wasted all that time. That sucks, because I could use some repeat business from that company...
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